What is wrong with Instant gratification anyway?

All hail The instant gratification generation!

Lately, with Christmas looming, I’ve been wondering what to buy for family members.  All the Christmas songs make it sound easy and fairly inexpensive.  After all, isn’t a personal handmade gift something to be treasured?  Sorry to say this is not so for the instant gratification generation! 

Instant gratification, so what does that mean?  Well, when a young adult sees a material thing they desire, whether it be a car, television set, expensive handbag or shoes, they buy it.  There is no waiting for the right time, a holiday, birthday or event.  They want it; they get it, right there and then.  If they cannot afford it there are always deferred payments, sales, and plastic.  After all, if they wait they may lose out.

Don’t get me wrong, we, the parents are responsible for this trend.  We’ve told them from the time they could walk that they deserve the best.  We’ve supported bad decisions, and helped them out of a debt countless times.  After all, they are adults.  They know the consequences, or do they?

The dangers of instant gratification are many.  High-interest rates, bad credit ratings, and money spent on impulse, when it could be used for more important things like rent and food. 

And what does this generation do when they become parents themselves.  They can no longer give in to the instant gratification to which they have grown accustomed.  They must sacrifice for their progeny.  They must become us, giving until there is nothing left to give.

I remember when I was a young mother.  My daughter was on top of the list.  Whatever she needed came first.  I wore my clothes till they were out of style.  I drove a used car.  I cooked dinners because restaurants were out of the question.  I paid my bills on time and my credit was immaculate. 

When my mother raised my three siblings and myself, she deprived herself of anything frivolous. If there was one piece of pie left, she cut it into four pieces and left none for herself. I believe that if there was a drought that woman would have died of thirst before she let us go without.

I am afraid for the instant gratification generation.  We, their parents will not walk this earth forever and one day they will have to depend upon only themselves.  They will have to sacrifice.  I hope that any new mother will teach their children unselfishness.  I hope that new mothers will sacrifice only when necessary and teach their children that instant gratification is not always possible. Unfortunately, as we age, we learn.  Maybe we learn too late.

I am afraid for the children of today. Every time  I enter a store there are always children crying and demanding their parents give in to their demands. And they do.  That, my friends, is instant gratification in its infancy.  And we only have ourselves to blame.

Is a fun cruise in your future? Read this first

Endless hallways

When I was a kid, our family had a Vista Cruiser station wagon.  I didn’t really like that land yacht but it did fit everyone in the family in that car.  Now I am thinking it was kind of prophetic that I should be on the Carnival Vista, their largest at the moment ship, cruising.  I’m not expert but I can tell you a few things about Carnival cruising since I’ve been on several of them on various sized vessels.

Carnival seems to be channeling “Jaws,” thinking they need bigger and bigger boats.  I hate to burst their bubble but bigger is not a plus on a cruise ship. I guess you have to think like their executives, however, the more people they can squeeze on a boat, the more money they make.

Size, it seems matters.  I’ve been on smaller boats and had a great time.  We got to see and do a lot on the smaller ships.  We saw shows, ate, drank, and played in the casino.  On the Vista, we didn’t do much of that at all.  We never got into one comedy show and the only variety show we were able to get into, we had a great view of a very shiny pole.  The Vista holds about 4,000 passengers and lines are as long as the football field length hallways.

So don’t be surprised if the last day of the cruise arrives and you have yet to experience the fun they are always touting, unless, of course, you consider waiting in lines fun.  There are infinite lines, lines,  everywhere lines.  The shows that you can actually get into are basically glorified infomercials, selling something.

And if you are a repeat cruiser and have been there, done that excursion, don’t bother staying on the boat.  There will be nothing to do, unless you want to get in the pool. And honestly, it is the best time to get in the pool since it won’t be crowded. If you want to spend some money you can always visit the spa.

When it comes to food, be prepared for yet again endless lines.  If you like the buffets you may not be able to see the end of the line without a pair of binoculars.  For example, at breakfast, we waited in line while people behind poked us with the tough like plates.  And when we finally got our food we had to walk around holding the plate till we found a place to park it before dinner.  Fortunately for me, I never cared for buffets.  The restaurant is a better bet as long as you can make it by their hours of operation.  On port days, better not sleep in.

Now, as we all know there is a lot of drinking on these boats.  They don’t call them fun ships for nothing.  The bathrooms are kind of wonky.  You may find the ladies room and think that the men’s room would be in pretty much the same vicinity, but you are wrong. I came across many a man confused, and bewildered, wandering around looking for the men’s room.

When the boat is at sea the pools as so full of people you may need a crowbar to shimmy yourself a spot.  There wasn’t a kiddie pool anywhere that I know of so kids were jumping and splashing into a crowd.  And I’ve yet to see anyone leave their drinks on the trays around the pool to find a bathroom.  And with all that drinking…see where I’m going here?  I’m kind of wondering if getting in that pool isn’t that different from sitting in a giant toilet bowl.

When you are a repeat cruiser they supposedly give you extra benefits.  Since I’ve been on six cruises, they gave us two free bottles of water and a drink coupon on the last day.  September is my birthday month and on my last cruise with my birthday two weeks away, they gave me a $50 certificate to the spa and a bottle of wine.  Nice touch.  This year, same time, different boat, yup, you guessed it I got Zippo.  And I don’t’ mean the lighter.

Finally, I don’t want to sound like a total negative Nancy buzz kill.  There are some pluses.  Aren’t there always a few pluses?  I have to say it was easier to get on the boat this time, without so much red tape.  The photos are no longer posted willy-nilly on bulletin boards but digitally presented on large screens.  And you can find it easily with a touch of a button in the photo section or on your cell phone.  All of that certainly saves paper.  So you did your part for the environment by saving a few trees.  You can do a lot on your cell phone, buy photos, order excursions and see what is going on at any specific moment.

They have a pretty nice IMAX theater on board showing current movies, for an additional fee of course.  If you want popcorn, however, you will be eating it out of a prepackaged little bag.  No popcorn smell to entice you and make you feel like you are really in a theater.

The food is much better on this boat than some of the boats I’ve been on.  Don’t get me wrong, on my first cruise several years ago the food was awesome.  Then it kind of went mediocre.  Now it’s pretty awesome again in the restaurants. 

That’s it for the pluses…Technology may have helped to get all the people on the boat easily, but leaving is quite another story.  Chaos is too kind a word.  We stood on a stairwell for quite some time inching along.  It seems that Carnival while getting 4,000 people off the boat are also in the process of loading 4,000 people on for the next cruise.  It feels kind of like, “hey we got your money, now get off.”  We were thankful that we didn’t check our luggage but hand carried because after waiting in this endless line we were herded into a big warehouse where the luggage was laying everywhere akin to a giant Easter egg hunt. 

To sum it all up, Carnival needs to get back to what made them fun.  They need to re-visit the little things that made people feel special and kept them re-booking new cruises.  On the large boats, they need to have more shows and things to do so that everyone and not just those who stand in line an hour before, can participate.

If there are inches between people in the pools and one has to shimmy into the water, maybe, just maybe, they need more pools.  Carnival is boasting that they are ready to unveil even larger boats than the Vista next year.  McDonald'snalds canceled the supersize and I think that Carnival should consider following suit.  Then again more people, means more money.  I still think that cruises are great value for a vacation, but should I cruise again, it will be only on the smaller boats.  And I think 6 cruises behind me it may be the time to try a different cruise line.

What do you do about the island of unwanted Christmas gifts?

Each Christmas well-meaning friends and relatives purchase a vast amount of gifts that are neither wanted or used.  Where do these unwanted Christmas gifts end up?  Well, in my house they end up in a pile in the basement.  I call it the island of lost and unwanted gifts.  Every so often I re-gift.  Yeah I know re-gifting is tacky.  And I would never re-gift a gaudy faux jewel encrusted box to someone who I knew wouldn't like it.  So I occasionally take a trip to the local Goodwill store.  After all you can take it off your taxes and donating feels good.

Gift cards are easy.  There are a ton of websites where a non-athletic person can trade a sporting goods gift card for, say, a Starbucks.  Another option is to sell gift cards you will never use.  Sure you get less than the face value, but it's better than sitting in a drawer for all eternity.  Be careful, however, and make sure the website is legitimate.

This year my husband received a virtual reality viewer.  He's in his 60's.  People in their sixties aren't interested in sitting in a room with a pendulous contraption strapped to their heads to look at scenery and such.  Although television commercials would have you believe otherwise, people of that age are more into real reality.  They go outside.  They ride roller coasters.  They experience real life.

I received a 1-inch square tile to attach to anything so that I can locate it via my phone.  Granted I lose things.  I get it.  I'm a ditz.  The thing I lose the most, however, is my phone.  The second thing I lose are my glasses and a tile hanging from them would be annoying at the very least.  And if I was the sort of person who wore those chains to keep them near at all times (which I don't) the problem of loss would be solved for $1.49.

I know gift giving is hard.  But you would think it would be easier for adult children.  So what follows is a gift giving guide for adult children-- for all occasions.

1.  Don't give knick-knacks or other dust catchers.  If they are old enough to be your parents, they have more than enough of those.

2.  Don't give them something you would like.  They are not in their 20's anymore.

3.  Clothing is a big NO.  Sizing is variable and do you really want to give your dad a jacket meant for a teenager in size XXL and have it still not fit?

4.  Don't give food.  Maybe you are unaware that dad had a heart issue and you gave him a membership to a bacon of the month club.

5.  Jewelry is governed by taste and style.  Stud earring for someone who only wears french hooks won't be worn.  And a monogram bracelet for a dad who wouldn't be caught dead in anything other than a wedding band is not a great idea.

6. Talk amongst your siblings if possible so your parents don't end up with 7 bird feeders.

7.  T-shirts with funny sayings or pictures.  Enough said!

8.  Gift cards to places the intended recipient would never go. Steer clear of a cute gift shop 60 miles away.  I don't like to tout stores, but Amazon can be used for many things and you can shop while you are in your pajamas.

9.  Restaurant cards are also not a super choice unless you are sure they love that restaurant.  A seafood restaurant isn't cool for someone allergic to sea food and a burger joint would be in bad taste for a vegetarian.

10.  Details!  Pay attention.  If you mom hates pink don't buy her a pink scarf even if it is cashmere.

So in conclusion it is really quite simple.  If you want a great idea of what you can get your parents any time of the year, think outside the wrapped box.  Memories are a great gift.  Smiles and laughter go a long way to enliven the soul.  Offers to help put away Christmas decorations or even help put them up before is so much more appreciated than skis.  Take them out to dinner and enjoy time together.  Spend time with them and call them often.  Gift a gift of yourself.  That is the best gift of all!

Birthday, birthday, birthday

September is here and September and October are big on birthdays in my family.  First of all tomorrow is my sister-in-law and brother-in-law's birthdays.  They are siblings, not twins but born in different years on the same day!  Next, comes my step daughter on the 10th, after which my brother follows. His birthday is the 23rd, one week away from mine which is the 29th.  You'd think I'd be done with birthdays by then, but nope, not a chance.

My other brother is the 13th of October, my sister's the 15th and my daughter's is the 16th!

By the end of October I'm pretty darned sick of that birthday song and have gained about 15 lbs. from all the birthday cakes!

So for all you who are having birthday's this month...put on that birthday hat and maybe tip a glass or two and have a

Happy Birthday!

If you want to make a glass special for all the birthday's in your life check out the following tutorial on Make it easy crafts. 

Birthday party wine glass