The Empty Nest

"Rebirth" ACEO

Today is the first day of school.  Today marks the first day in many years that I don’t have anyone going to school.  I am almost an empty nester.  I say almost because the last of our progeny has decided to join the Air Force and is waiting for his call to Boot camp.

Soon the day will come when my husband has gone to work and I wake up to an empty house and I am not looking forward to it.

I have discussed this irrational fear with many of my friends who have preceded me with their own empty nests. Most of them laugh at my unnecessary worry.  With their help I have made up a list of the unseen benefits of an empty nest and they are as follows:

You will regain control of the television.  You will only have to watch ESPN or Spongebob if you want to.

You can fix all sorts of meals that don’t include nuggets or fries.

You will, for the first time in a long time, have privacy and you can walk around the house any way you want.  This will make you want to go the gym, which will increase your lifespan.

Your grocery bill will decrease and you will actually be able to afford a manicure.

No more bank of mom or dad.

You won’t have to drive a mini van any longer and you can get that two-door sport coupe.

Eventually you will become a grandma, nana or memaw and you can smile as you hand the candy filled grandkids back to their parents along with the new drum set.

You won’t have to teach anyone to drive or use the potty. Those chores will become someone else’s responsibility.

Vacations will be easier and cheaper, and you won’t have to plan them around places that include mouse ears.

You will be able to pass by fast food places without someone asking for a “joyful“ meal.

These are just a few of the benefits that have been pointed out to me.  I am sure there are others.  I have been told that it takes about two weeks before you embrace your new status. All joking aside I sure hope so.